App App App

I’m gonna be honest with you guys – I don’t garden and my cleaning style is…casual? Last year my mom gave me the clippings of an aloe plant that first, the cat ate, and then, I replanted and forgot to water. My father gave me three Hasta (?) plants to put in front of my porch – a plant I was guaranteed “will always come back” and let me tell you the forecast does not look good. Something I am good at, however, is the internet and I did some sleuthing to find some helpful gardening and cleaning apps that, let’s be honest, I’ll never use – but may be helpful for you guys and your green thumbs and your “clean houses.”


BrightNest gives you a variety of tasks around the home and DIY-projects to try, divided into eight categories; healthy, green, savvy, curious, clean, handy, creative, and hungry. This is for people whose houses are already clean and they are just looking for more to do. Who are those people?

Unfilth Your Habitat 

The description of this app reads “Terrifying motivation for lazy people with messy homes.” This app is not for those who abhor profanity – there are a lot of fwords and a-words and s-words and d-words – all my favorite kinds of words. The app lets you choose different challenges for cleaning up, varying in times from five to twenty minutes. I’m legit going to use this app, because the only alternative is just hiring someone to yell at me while I lay on the couch and watch Barefoot Contessa reruns.


You ever see a leaf on the ground and are all, “I wonder what kind of tree that is from? I must know immediately!” Me, neither. But if you do, there is an app for you! Take a photo of that sexy leaf against a white background and this app will tell you what kind of tree it came from. The internet is magic.


With this app you can take a picture of your boring house and then add different plants, trees, flowers, etc. to the photo to map out your dream house and garden. Mine would be an English garden that I could sit for a spell with a book or take the air with a handsome stranger that just happened to emerge from a lake on the property dripping wet wearing a white shirt and jodhpurs…sorry, I got distracted.